Have you heard the news? Giancarlo Stanton ($5,800) will be playing in Coors Field tonight, and baseball officials have modified the rules to account for his Herculean power. So, in order for Stanton to hit a home run, the ball must completely leave the stadium; anything in the seats is an out. It’s only fair. Stanton DGAF though. Okay, I’m full of sh*t, man – just like that John Denver.
But yeah, I’ll have all the Giancarlo because the pitching options are pretty ugly, which in turn, means it’s time to take some risks and save some money. That’s a good thing though, because there is going to be some major point scoring going on, and you’ll need every cent to spend on bats. No, not the flying rodents; I mean the wood things. Anyways, continue on to see where my head’s at for tonight’s slate.
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Stupid Weather, Man
Of course the only game in real danger of the wet stuff is in Colorado. The internet tells me there’s a 40-60% chance of thunderstorms, but I’m not scared. They will get the game in – believe that.
They Say it is Your Birthday
No birthdays to report [insert sad trombone].
Breakfast at Whiffany’s
The Orioles really like striking out. Well, they probably hate it, but that’s beside the point. Baltimore is averaging more than eight strikeouts per game and their K rate is 23% against RHP. Shaun Marcum ($4,300) has pitched surprisingly well since rising from the dead, and with a K/9 of 9.61, I’m gonna do the damn thing. I got money to blow-oh-oh.
I’m going to spend up a little for SP2, but he’ll still leave me with a lot of wiggle room at the plate. Edinson Volquez ($7,800) has also resurrected his career (for now), and he has been cooking at home this year. Volquez owns a .176 BAA in Kauffman Stadium, where he has yet to allow a home run (knock on wood). The Royals are playing host to the Rangers tonight, who also average more than eight whiffs per game, and sport a K rate over 20% against RHP.
Let’s Talk About Stacks, Baby (and other stuff)
I reckon an Indians stack is in order against Chris Tillman, who suuuuucks. No stats needed to support that fact. Fine, here’s one. Tillman’s 4.75 BB/9 is astronomical, and when you pair that with a justified .286 BAA, a beautiful stack is born. Stackables include Jason Kipnis ($4,800), Michael Brantley ($4,700), Brandon Moss ($4,400), Lonnie Chisenhall ($3,600), and David Murphy ($3,000).
There’s not much science behind a Blue Jays stack, especially when they’re in Canada, eh? Toronto (and Minnesota) leads the majors with 5.35 runs per game at home. Roberto Hernandez (RHP) is mediocre on a good day, but I predict this day will be bad … for him. Stackables include Josh Donaldson ($5,300), Jose Bautista ($5,200), Jose Reyes ($4,600), Russell Martin ($4,300), and Ryan Goins ($2,300). I’m out on Edwin Encarnacion ($4,900), who not only is dinged up (hamstring), but has burned me all season.
Did I mention Minnesota? Why, yes, I did. They get Kyle Lohse (RHP) tonight, who is third in HR/9 (1.88), and I don’t see him stepping up to the plate against his former team (figuratively, not literally). Stackables include Brian Dozier ($4,700), Torii Hunter ($4,100), Trevor Plouffe ($4,000), Eddie Rosario ($3,000), Eduardo Escobar ($2,900), and Kurt Suzuki ($2,900).
Paul Goldschmidt ($5,700) is hitting .349 against lefties this year. Okay, he’s hitting .349 against righties too, so it doesn’t really matter who he is facing. Just ask Matt Harvey. But still, Jonathan Niese is a southpaw, and Goldy is a boss with a career 1.065 OPS versus LHP at home. You do the math.
Mike Trout ($5,600) rakes in Yankee Stadium. In 10 career games, he has a triple slash of .410/.500/.692 – is that something you might be interested in? Fans of Entourage will get that one. I think my wife is making me see the move tonight. TBH, I’m not too excited about it.
Alex Rodriguez ($4,000) will be the BVP chalk play of the day because of his 1.469 OPS and five dongs in 35 PA against Jered Weaver. I’ll pass.
Another BVP chalk play is Dustin Pedroia ($4,200) against Scott Kazmir (LHP), who is Pedroia’s gimp. In 50 career PA, DP (giggidy) holds a 1.380 OPS and has struck out only twice. I like this one a little more than A-Fraud.
Jordan Pacheco ($2,400) is a decent punt at catcher. He is hitting .306 at home and facing a lefty (Niese).
I’m tired of typing. Good luck tonight, and be sure to double-check those lineups!